aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhh! i need earplugs for the silence! my {many} attempts to go inward and still have rendered me in slobbering fits. i want to pluck a banjo whilst wearing a tutu; not find my breathy bliss sans pretty pictures in my head. how do you nutjobs...
Christmas in November!!! Yippee Skippy!! So i made my way to J.Crew; newly discovered credit in hand, drool catching bib around neck. Decisions! Decisions! As you’ll see I was obviously in an accessorizing mood. There’s only so much I can do with black...
Come on? I’m totally right! Cleaning out one’s junk drawer is just like cleaning out one’s ass: best done wearing gloves, by oneself, when everything else has already been scoured speckless. Yesterday, I found myself, alone in my spic and span house,...
As if i didn’t hate myself enough? Just when i had  tucked and squeezed my half-japanese quads into your “skinny jeans” (mind you with the help of K-Y and a shoe horn) you have to throw toothpick jeans at me?!!??! Apparently it’s the...
