This is Janet. She works the Red Carpet desk in the United terminal of the Denver airport. Never before have I witnessed such blatant social ineptness in my life. She wasn’t just downright discourteous; she was beastly. Wielding her six inches of barstool height as if it were competency and endowment, Janet smugly and indiscriminately bounced travelers, too inelegant for her taste, from entering her precious Red Carpet Club. Whereupon you were wearing the same eye shadow as Janet, Wet -N- Wild MegaEye Shadow Trio in Island Blues, she would allow you behind the escalator no problem (thank GOD my dark circles mimic the look.)

When the 85-year-old, World War II Air Force Veteran showed his card for the lounge, tight-lipped Janet closed her eyes in disgust, shook her head, said his card wasn’t “good” at her location, and to please “move out of the way, there’s a long line of people.” Luckily there are more decent people than there are Janets. The gentleman in front of us quickly grabbed our war hero, and signed him in as his guest. You’d think this biznatch would keep her mouth shut, wouldn’t you?!?! Oh no, she loudly reprimanded the gentleman telling him he’s “breaking the rules and diminishing the Red Carpet Club;” and that he must “gather up” his guest before he leaves.  I’m usually of the mindset that we all should be treated equal, but in the case of Veterans (yes i’m capitalizing) all bets are off. I know I’ll never comprehend the valor, strength, loyalty and sacrifice these individuals have made. Thus, when possible I know I just need to shut my big, fat mouth and pay RESPECT. T’was not the case for Miss Janet. My mouth is still agape at her vulgarity and ignorance.

Janet, I’m sorry you were born with such bad taste. I’m sorry the banana clip went out of style, and that Chico’s stopped carrying your favorite Navajo embroidered, denim skorts. I’m sorry your husband would rather drink pond scum from Love Canal than take you out to Arby’s for a meal. But that doesn’t give you the right to act like such trash.

So readers, if you happen to be in this vicinity I urge you to stop by, and give Janet a little encouragement/lesson in human decency.