splendid, friday wishes to you m’loves.

i am still so bewildered and sad over the death of the great writer, screenwriter, director, journalist and mother, nora ephron. she was in a talent league of her own, and taken away much too soon.

do you have a favorite nora ephron movie? i never tire of when harry met sally. just typing it out puts a smile on my face. 

although her movies and books have filled my life with much laughter, tears {hello heartburn?}, and conversation, ms. ephron’s biggest influence on my life has been from something she said in her 1996 commencement address to the graduates of wellesley college: 

be the heroine of your own life, not the victim.

ever since those ten words flew through my eardrums and up into my cerebral cortex, i think of them multiple times a day. 

typically it’s the non-victim slice of the quote i choose to savor, luxuriate in like a crispy baked black bass or a lisa gerrard serenade; i personally think the word victim is one of the dirtiest words in the dictionary. 

but lately, i’ve been more interested in heroism.

a hero conjures so many different images to people.

to me a hero is kind, forgiving, patient, and humble. 

i feel i am my most heroic when i am on my knees, in the wrong, which is often, and can admit it to the world for all their judgement and scorn.

i also feel quite brave and valiant when i am able to love unconditionally on someone who has hurt me. it may not be a face to face embrace, or a written word acquittal, but softening my heart on an attacker feels better than if the wound never existed at all. and people say i have some ugly scars. 

every night, as i give thanks for the gifts in my life, people i love, beasts i’d walk in front of a car for, i also send love and affection out to those who aren’t in my cabinet of trust. i try to have my final awakened thoughts as i drift into dreamland, ones of peace and compassion so that  i can sleep with both eyes shut, not on the lookout for enemies.

what about you? what do you find heroic? 

wishing you a heroic weekend m’loves.

see you on the other side of sunday.