i KNEW it!!!

October 17, 2013

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so after 37 strung out, trick-turning years, feeling completely defenseless against all things chocolate sandwiched, science has validated my enslavement to nabisco:

oreos are as addictive as cocaine to your brain!

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no longer will i feel ashamed about my nights out clubbing, scurrying away to the ladies room with a razor blade and my old “ace of base” cd where i grind said oreos down to a mind-blowing, nap-inducing, pant-stretching powder.

oreo

farewell to freebasing in shame on 17th street with the rest of my tweaker friends {fyi i had to look up the proper spelling of “tweaker,”} i will binge on the rich, tasty filling with pride and abandonment.

will i have to show my i.d though when buying my crunchy, creamy stash at the market; like when i need sudafed for my “cold.”

although i like my oreos straight up, undiluted and pure i thought i’d share some of the most interesting ways other users mainline their fix.

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starting the day with a jolt is mighty important. these pancakes look as if they will do a proper job sending a rush of serotonin to my hungry and addicted receptors.

c1dd10b55cf5984f18e8f1a9bb5b3c8fmove over cannabis brownies, there’s a new cartel in town; these babies use crack  oreos to turn your mediocre dinner party into a dunkin hines rager.

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sorry john belushi, but this is what speedballs look like in our hood.

let’s party.

tell me m’loves what’s your favorite way to get your fix in?

and if you need me in the next six months, i’ll be checked in at the betty crocker center for oreo addiction.

 

  • Hysterical. Too many to post.

    • goodniteirene

      i know ann….i could do a week of posts of stuff i'd like to do to an oreo….{did i just write that?}

  • I thought pink and white animals cookies were your crack? 😉

    • goodniteirene

      raquel! animal cookies are my socially acceptable {deemed by me} forbidden fruit….oreos aren't allowed in the house or near me……i only consume them in private, under the veil of darkness, with other fellow junkies….

  • I'm convinced that tweaking and twerking (sp?) are the hardest 2 words to spell in the english language. But anyway, all that chocolate–omg, just when I've gone back to juicing! You are a bad influence!

    • goodniteirene

      you're juicing?! with your own juicer? you are hard core…

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