yesterday as the sun lifted over the newport beach skyline, a mighty crew of 5 showed up at my front door ready to home improve.

with their boots steel-toe enforced, and their belts accessorized in summer’s latest fancy hammers, shiny wrenches and drivers that screw, my boys were ready to help me fancy up the hearth.

here’s how it all went down:

i am finally giving into the demands of painting our guest room. but only at the request of a guest {my mother.} i’ve always considered benjamin moore’s linen white {a favorite white for many decorators} practically a dark, chocolate-brown. the walls in my house are so white you pretty much get sunburned from the reflection. i hand out spf 75 to all who enter. but i will bend….for my guest. she loves a deep taupe, and she did birth me y’know; no charge either.

speaking of guests…this one had to be reminded that she ultimately IS a guest in this house. her misbehaving and flirtations with the construction workers was off the charts. snooki levels! how else do you think that hooker got pregnant priscilla?!!?

she left me little choice but to leash her to my desk. 

her brother, on the other hand, wanted to check into a hotel on the farthest side of town. under the desk he hid until the last pick-up truck drove away.

come lunch time the boys demanded EZ-TAKEOUT, costa mesa’s answer to the in-n-out burger. many would argue EZ far surpasses the large chain. eager to please my hungry men i hightailed it into the drive-thru where i met a mecca of menus, options, combos, number 4’s and 5’s and a speaker system circa 1984, high school-cafeteria auditorium, with an equivalent pissed off, high school chemistry teacher posing as a fast food attendent, who was none too pleased with me for not knowing the full particulars of an all-white-patty? silly me, i thought it was some terrible, racist sandwich. 

now, i haven’t been to a drive-thru since my college days. i’m not down with today’s fast food culture. i felt like my mom trying to send a text with the remote control. i panicked. unfamiliar with the proper language and protocol, and of course dressed in completely the wrong clothes, i felt little beads of perspiration pierce through my matte-finish tinted moisturizer, i quickly threw the car in reverse, parked and found sanctuary at the walk-up. 

after ordering the burgers and pissing the owner off with my “is your beef grass-fed?” question i zipped back home with my factory farmed sandwiches and  cancer in a cups {3 dr. peppers and 2 sprites.}

and what a surprise i had waiting for me: my michelle armas painting was hung! remember when i got this steal on one king’s lane last spring? well, it’s been sitting in its box for months waiting to show itself over our living room. i just love it. another reason why i think the super white walls look great: any art i hang pops really well against them. at least i think it does. 

and we also had our headboard FINALLY installed. after a visit with feng shui expert, jennifer bonnetto, last january, hh and i learned we had several energy issues with our furniture placement and home design. one of the biggies was our lack of headboard in the master bedroom. apparently we were subject to serious marital squabbles with the lack of backing during the nocturnal hours. i’m happy to report that although we weren’t ones for relationship discord to begin with, but please don’t get me started on air conditioning in the car, things have been blissful between us in the 16 hours post installation.

but the absolute knockout of yesterday’s toil is our fountain. another feng shui must. the fountain in the backyard supposedly balances the mountains {otherwise known as our fence} in our front yard, and provides abundance and prosperity. 

i just think it looks pretty and the sound is absolutely heavenly. i can’t believe it’s taken this long to put one in. all night long we listened to the tiny, little drops of water, pitter-patter down into the soft pool. bye-bye stress. 

the crew is here all week. so expect more updates.

tuesday happy m’loves.